Vocation Director Don Miller departs with the knowledge that

Man proposes, God disposes

BY TONI CASHNELLI PHOTOS BY TONI CASHNELLIWhen he started, “There were many days I was convinced Iwould never see a vocation,” says Don Miller.

Don Miller had it all figured out.

“I was gonna be a diocesan priest,” he says, settling behind the meeting table in the Vocation Office at Mt. Airy. In high school, “I visited the Viatorian novitiate in Arlington Heights [Ill.]” So what happened? “I didn’t want to join because they worked with young people.”

Attracted by their variety of ministries, he became a friar.

“Within six years of ordination, I was teaching and working with young people.” That set the stage for the next 38 years, the past 12 of which he has been Vocation Director for the Province.

“Does God have a sarcastic sense of humor?” Sure sounds like it.

Don is laughing as he tells this and other stories about the journey that led him here, a journey that takes a sharp turn as he starts a sabbatical after resigning from the Vocation Office. You have to laugh, he says. “It’s essential to religious life.”

It’s still a mystery

He’s looking and sounding less stressed these days, with good reason.  The high-profile job he’s turning over to Larry Zurek and Luis Aponte-Merced is a huge responsibility. Don says the timing is “providential, something new for me as well as the office.” After a series of surgeries and setbacks from a torn quadriceps tendon he suffered a year-and-a-half ago, “I physically can’t keep up with the travel and that kind of stuff.”

Don is not the province’s longest serving Vocation Director – Paul Scales served two stints for a total of 22 years – but he is among the most respected. “I think the best compliment I got was at Jubilee [on May 25] when someone said, ‘I always felt secure when you were Vocation Director,’ that I gave the province a sense that recruitment was alive. I’m happy with what I did.”

Despite Don’s success, “I have no idea why some guys join and some don’t. I still find vocation work a mystery.” He came to it from academia. “I was in my seventh year at Walsh University [in North Canton, Ohio]. A year before I left I told Fred [Link] it was time for me to move on.” Given the options, “I didn’t think I could do vocation work. The President of Walsh [Richard Jusseaume] said, ‘Take it,’ so I did.”

​Norbert Bertram and Luis Aponte-Merced at the Vocation Office with Don.Don at Mt. Airy.E-mail and Facebook revolutionized communication with prospective friars. PHOTOS BY TONI CASHNELLIAt the time, “There was nothing written” about the duties of the Vocation Director. Before leaving the office, Norbert Bertram signed Don up for a vocation conference, but the rest was a blank slate. “It was rough getting started. There were many days I was convinced I would never see a vocation. I remember spending time in the chapel at Mt. Airy before the statue of St. Francis and St. Clare, and saying, ‘This is a community. If you want it to grow, do something.’”

Hit the road

After that, “It kind of developed from scratch. I starting making the mini-CD video” that was used for years as a vocation tool. “I started getting busy, returning phone calls. Guys teased me about calling back so fast.” Don laughs. “I had nothing else to do.”

 From his time at Walsh, “I was used to how young guys think and work. I decided to go out to them, spending time with them and start mentoring them that way. I got in the car and started traveling.” He spent 30 to 40% of his time outside the office, flying as far as Seattle, Wash., to answer men’s questions and concerns about religious life. “I learned way back when I was a Newman Chaplain that visiting guys on their home turf tells you a lot more – seeing them in their home setting, whether they were young enough to live alone, how they handle themselves.”

Most are nervous. “Someone’s coming from a religious community to talk At a conference with the late Bob Lucero of the Vocation team, former Novice Nick Thorvaldsen and friend.Don giving a presentation on the younger generation.about a way of life. I joke around and try to set a tone. I try to ease that nervousness by letting them ask questions,” the typical ones being, “Will I ever see my family again?” and “What do you guys do all day?” The image of religious life, Don says, “is that we pray all day.”

There were times that “as soon as I got out of the car I knew it was a disaster. One guy, his living room was as dark as a cave, lit by 200-300 vigil lights in front of statues. His father took me aside and said, ‘Is this how all you Catholics are?’ A couple of times I sensed some mental disturbance. One guy, a Vietnam veteran, told me he was paranoid schizophrenic when I got there.”

What guys want

Don never made a “pitch”. “What turned me off is that recruiters would promise some guys the world. We are not selling our religious communities. You can’t convince someone to join. You can’t sell a religious vocation.” What you CAN do is “enthusiastically present our lifestyle.”

Guys want honesty, he says, “authenticity and fairness. We need to keep asking ourselves, ‘How authentically are we living our lives?’ Once they see you as unfair, you’re dead.” Beyond that, “The community in general needs to be more welcoming and inviting. They [young people] are rambunctious, bouncing off the walls, but so were we” at that age. “There is a vitality about young people that’s catching.”

Leaving the job, “I will miss watching the guys develop, whether they stay or not. I get a lot of satisfaction from that. I have really enjoyed seeing some of these guys grow up and knowing I had some part in it.”

Unfortunately, “Some guys I really thought would make good friars opted not to join.” You can’t explain “how God is working in these young men’s lives. It’s something you can’t control.” Whatever happens, “It’s not my choice. I made mine years ago.”

Now he’s made another choice, leaving the Vocation Office to renew his training in moral theology. “I’ll be looking for workshops. The other thing I want to do is teach myself how to do websites. It’s something I’m fascinated with. I want to take some time for prayer, reading, exercise.”

That’s the plan. We’ll see what God has in store.

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Diocese celebrates service

BY FR. LEONARD CORNELIUS, OFM

Left, John Joseph Gonchar with his award; below, J.J. at St. Paul with other honorees.On Sunday, June 7, the Diocese of Pittsburgh honored a number of consecrated men and women and lay men and women for outstanding service in the life of the diocese at a Mass celebrated at St. Paul Cathedral. The honorees were selected, in the case of the consecrated men and women, by their major superiors; the lay men and women by the pastors of their respective parishes.

Fr. John Joseph Gonchar received the award for our Province. In one photo he is seen seated among the Religious men and women awaiting the beginning of the Mass. To his right is Sr. Janice of the Sisters of the Holy Family of Nazareth and behind her is Sr. Jeanne Marie of the School Sisters of St. Francis. Among the services that John Joseph is providing, once a week he visits the residents of the nursing homes operated by these two congregations of Sisters.

Bishop David Zubik was the main celebrant and homilist at the Mass. There were several Concelebrants, including Vicar Frank Jasper. At the conclusion of the Mass each honoree was called upon by name to receive a glass plaque from the bishop. In the second photo John Joseph is seen holding the plaque which reads:

Diocese of Pittsburgh
with recognition and appreciation
Reverend John Joseph Gonchar OFM
Manifesting the Kingdom 2015

At the conclusion of the celebration in the cathedral the Friars at Holy Family Friary along with Frank went to a restaurant to have dinner together on this happy occasion.

 

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Gil Wohler at Mercy Community in 2008.He never met a stranger

BY TONI CASHNELLI

He loved people, and they loved him back.

 This was obvious at the June 6 funeral for Gil Wohler. The line, “Brothers to each other and to the world”, from “Facing Our Future with Hope”, seemed to have been written for him.

“I’ve only known the man for 30 days,” said neighbor Cherri Southerland, a recent arrival at Mercy Community at Winton Woods, where Gil lived and ministered for a decade.  “There was something about his spirit that would draw you in. I’d pray for him, and he’d turn around and pray for me. I was good for the day.”

Cherri was among 120 people – an overflow crowd – at St. Clement for the Reception of the Body. They represented Gil’s time as a pastor, a missionary, a vocations director, a teacher, a spiritual director, a chaplain, and a liaison to the Franciscan Alumni Association. Many had never laid eyes on each other. But all of them could relate.

Losing their heartGil in 1990Right, Gil gets a ride during Chapter at St. Meinrad.; below, with Santa during Advent with the Franciscans.Photos from Gil’s ministry, displayed on memory boards at St. Clement.

“I came to the former seminary in 2012,” said Dominic Lococo. “Gil was one of the reasons I wanted to go there. He was our local minister but he never flaunted his authority.”  In recent years when Gil’s ailments multiplied, “I was his driver. He was so appreciative. St. Paul in his Epistles said we’re all part of one body. For our place, Gil was the heart. The fact that we lost our heart doesn’t mean we lost everything. He’s praying for us, looking down on us.”

Two years his junior, Joe Ricchini bonded with Gil in formation. “One of the beautiful things about our way of life is we see the whole span of a person’s life,” Joe said. “It was nice to see how Gil developed.” In school, “He was an outstanding athlete, an outstanding shortstop.” That all came back when Joe visited Gil the day he died. “I told him, ‘Gil, there’s nothing to be said.’ I was holding his hand. That son of a gun still had big arms.”

“He could have been a professional baseball player,” said Dave Stenz, who met Gil through an uncle in the seminary. “He said he would have a longer career as a Franciscan.”

Celebrant Frank Jasper welcomed Gil’s brother Ken and wife Lydia, niece Amy Winter, nephew Allan Weilert, and thanked a long list of groups large and small, including caregivers, for being there. “It’s so great to see so many of you who have come to remember him and pray with him and for him.”

Reluctant homilist

Homilist Manuel Viera remembered a time during his parish days out West when funerals were so frequent they became second nature. “Today was not second nature,” he said, admitting how hard it was to preach for a friend. In 2002 when Gil suffered a brush with death, he told Manuel, “‘You’re preaching my funeral.’ That was not easy to take, and it is not easy today.”

 Their friendship deepened when Manuel moved to St. Francis Seraph, where Gil was pastor. “Once a week we would go out to eat. During those times I tried to get out of this job. Gil would not let me. For the last three years since I’ve been gone from Cincinnati we kept in regular touch through the phone. The calls stopped in March,” when Gil began to decline. Manuel phoned three weeks ago, and all his friend could say was,

“Good-bye”.

Today, “I think what Gil wants to communicate to us is that we are loved by God; that has been his life and ministry” at the seminary, in parishes, at the Vocation Office and in South Africa. “All that he proclaimed to us is, ‘God loves you’. I’m sure he’s rejoicing in that love.” If we ask, “’Gil Wohler, son of Francis, do you love me?’, the Lord will point to everything Gil has done that demonstrates and shows that love.”

The last word

Manuel reached for his cell phone. “I’m gonna let Gil have the last word,” he said, attempting to play back a voicemail message without success. “Basically,” Manuel explained, “it is Gil speaking, ‘I am not here today. Leave a message.’ Gil, our message is that we love you. As you look at the face of the Father, pray for us that we may be able to continue the work of God you have begun.”

Asked to describe Gil in one word, Mike Chowning said, “A brother. And not just as a friar, a brother to everyone he met. He could relate to the young, the elderly, he just had that way; they felt comfortable with him.”

Cherri, the neighbor who met Gil a month ago, could testify to that. “It didn’t take me 10 years to find out he was a good man,” she said. “It took two days.”

• There were tears and cheers at Immaculate Conception Church last weekend as Bruce Hausfeld gave the homily for his brother Bryant’s Golden Jubilee as a priest. The Hausfeld brothers returned to Alamogordo, N.M., for the celebration, where Bryant was pastor for 19 years. Bruce described Bryant’s wide-ranging service and focused on his best-known ministry, “his greatest love, and that is caring, helping, saving, counseling young men afflicted with addictions, young men in trouble with the law, young men with drug and alcohol problems.” He read part of a greeting sent to Bryant by one of those men, who wrote: “If I want to know, appreciate, believe that there is the possibility of genuine love, God’s love, in this broken world, you, Fr. Bryant, are the nearest thing to absolute, glowing beauty that I know.” Bryant says he was brought to tears when Bruce asked all the young people who had been helped by his brother to stand.  “It was unbelievable all the people who stood up,” Bryant says. “It was great.”
• Don Miller reports that Daniel Ward was approved by the Admissions Board for the 2015 Postulancy Daniel WardProgram on June 5. “The official acceptance will come from Jeff once he returns. But know that the Board did approve him. He is the sole member of this year’s class. Dan was born and raised in Park Ridge, Ill. He is the third son of John and Mary Ward. He attended Main South High School in Park Ridge, Ill., and recently graduated from Oakton Community College in Des Plaines, Ill., with an Associate Degree. His field of study was early childhood education. He works at Happy Foods as a deli clerk. Pending final approval by Jeff, Dan will join Mark Soehner and the community at Duns Scotus in Berkley, Mich., at the end of August.”
• Eighty-six and counting: That’s how many years the friars of Holy Family Parish have served as priests. Earlier this week they celebrated their June anniversaries with an outing in Galveston, Texas, that featured “Good, relaxing seaside dinner, great conversation about old times and new, and gigantic pieces of cake!”, according to Richard Goodin. Congratulations to Maynard Tetreault (55 years June 7), E.J. Stein (30 years June 8), and Richard (one year, June 14).

Thanks and goodbye to Peoria

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